Adding Another Dimension
By Jonathan Lam on 02/03/16
Tagged: the-homework-life the-homework-life-thought
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One thing about packing depressed me a little. I had to pack these brand-new ice skates my mother had practically just sent me a couple of days before. That depressed me … It made me feel pretty sad. She bought me the wrong kind of skate—I wanted racing skates and she bought hockey—but it made me sad anyway. Almost every time somebody gives me a present, it ends up making me sad.
This quote bothered me quite a bit as I was reading it. Not only was Holden beginning to develop his caring personality and deviate from his monotonous, bored teenager self (which bothers me because it makes him a more complicated character that would be more difficult to analyze), but I find this disturbingly true.
Our family values have never included material goods at the top of our lists. This includes gifts— we know that no tangible thing nor wealth can give anyone true happiness the way a memorable experience or the presence of a special person can. Only if you put something to good use to expand what you are truly passionate towards could give you any bit of content in your life— if you were a true musician, for instance, then this special object would be your instrument.
Even though it's clear (to me) that gifts are not the solution to happiness, they are a common form of courtesy. But it begs the question: why do we send gifts? And what is the true source of happiness in our life? I don't believe I'll be able to answer the second question (which I believe is completely up to personal opinion), but I believe I can again attack our strange societal ways (because I always love satirizing human nature…).
What makes us powerful? Possessions. In the old days, land. Wealth became more important when more organized systems came around. And when civilized societies developed, then respect and reputation were the major players. But never gone from our memories is the idea of ownership, the desire to physically have more. We like to hold things, to compete for the one with the most and best of something. An example in popular culture is Pokémon's "Gotta Catch 'em All!" and card trading in general. When we have more around us, we feel more powerful. To amass a fortune of items, precious or not, is a way to look at your achievements and memories. Each artifact you own has a story attached to it— "This snow globe came from my late aunt Polly back in '72 when I got my first car," or "I got this watch from my brother when I knocked a kid out for the first time"— and these stories add up to create a mask over yourself. You surround yourself with comforts, things that are familiar and friendly to you. Gifts are a prominent example of this.
Another ego-booster that gifts provide is the act of receiving. Why would somebody give you something if they don't like you or care for you? It may seem this is valid, but it is hardly more than an act of courtesy. In the ultra-rich, ultra-modern ubiquitous-product world of today, it's not difficult to choose out a cool little gadget for your friend or family member. People are expected to give wedding gifts, birthday gifts, anniversary gifts. It's supposed to make you feel happy for the aforementioned reasons.
But what if it doesn't? What if, like Holden said in Catcher in the Rye, it "ends up making [you] sad"? Do we have a right to simply throw away the gifts in an attempt to rid ourselves of them? Or is it too rude of an idea to consider? As previously mentioned, gifts are memories; but if a memory turns sour— say for instance that the loved one that gave you the gift died or the girlfriend or spouse broke up with you—, then any associated gifts would suddenly become evil.
What do we do with an evil memory? We shove it to the back of our minds. We may try to throw it away (and it's easier to throw away a tangible gift in an angry rage), but it remains there, in our mind. Unfortunately, gifts act the same. They are physical elements tied to our lives, and they create even stronger memories with an additional, concrete representation.
In a way, it's similar to the self-portraits that we were talking about in English class the other day— rather than a more abstract autobiography or description in words, a picture provides many more details. It provides a different, concrete view of ourselves. A picture is worth a thousand words; in the same way, that simple "gift" adds much more meaning to a memory.
It's not so simple to describe the concepts of gifts. They are items chosen to make someone happier, but they are much more than that. They are a figment of a memory. They are abstract. They are a different dimension of ourselves, and they help define our personalities.